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Wednesday 28 July 2010

Would somebody please tell me where the weeks are going? Time is flying by.... I just cannot believe that we are about to enter August already !!!
I've been working very long hours this past two weeks, in some ways this is good. It's bringing in the extra money which I will be needing and it's helping to take my mind off all the other things going on in my life, but the only downside to this extra work is the hours I am away from my girls. Luckily 2 evenings a week they have dinner at their Nans, and 2 evenings a week dinner at their dads, and then one night every weekend they stay at their dads, so I'm quite lucky to have some good support. However, I now find myself with TWO DAYS OFF WORK!!! Me excited, YES !! So plan for today is to take youngest to the dentist, and then head to the shops with both of them. I'm really looking forward to spending some quality time with them.....hopefully go to the pictures today or tomorrow aswell...
On the ww side of things, I have been an angel, apart from last night. My eldest daughter and her now Fiance returned from her holiday in Corfu and decided to come round and spend time with her Mum :O) ... we ended up ordering Chinese, which was heavenly...I haven't had anything naughty in a long time, so I made the most of it !! I haven't dared step on the scales yet this morning, perhaps I will wait for Friday !!!
Hope you all have a great day xx


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Saturday 24 July 2010

One week on .....

Well I have survived the first week since hubby left. One week today he went, and all in all its been a good week. I have not had any moments where I have regretted my decision at all, on the contrary really, even though pretty much he has text me every day to say he is missing me and wants me back. I have stuck to my guns and been strong. I know thats not what I want.
I'm trying to get organised as a single person. Finances are pretty much in order, and to be honest things are not looking as bad in that department as I thought they would be. With having two jobs this really helps, although sometimes I wish I didn't so I could spend more time with my girls during the six week hols. But its not as if they are little. They are capable of amusing themselves for a while !
Housework is proving a little tiring after long days at work, but although I'm pretty much on top of everything, I may rope in some additional help from the girls while they are on holiday ! They don't know it yet !!

Emotionally I feel happier than I have done for a long time. My lovely friend Karon came over Thursday night for a lovely natter and a cuppa. I think she could see a difference in me already! We talked for a few hours and had a giggle which was nice. If my hubby had of been there he would have moaned about someone coming over mid-week when he needed to get sleep before work, but now I can please myself!
On top of all of this, I am 100% focused on the ww front. In fact I have lost 2lbs !!! Im now 12st 11 lbs . Over the moon with that. I'm looking forward to getting the next 13 pounds off to be back to where I was before Christmas. I really feel in the zone again....hoooray !!

So all in all a good week ! Thank you all again for your lovely comments on my last post. You really are such lovely people, and I really appreciate it.
I noticed this week that I have reached 100 followers of my blog !! Wow that is amazing ! I'm honoured and touched to think people want to know about me, especially when I have been down a lot lately. But thank you, each and every one of you, thank you for taking the time to follow me. It truly means a lot xxxxxx

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Sunday 18 July 2010

Its finally over .......

After all these months of uncertainty, hubby has now finally left. He left yesterday. There have been tears, lots of tears, from both him and me. Although I dont hate him, or dislike him, I know I couldn't have carried on another month, let alone another 25 years with him. It would of been easier if I hated him. Instead of the tears there would have been anger, but no. I truly wish him happiness in the future. Its going to be a struggle financially for me, but I'm prepared for that. I dont know how I feel emotionally. Its odd not having him here, its strange not having someone to chat too like now for example when the kids are out. Its strange to have the bed to myself, its strange not to hear him moaning ...... there is a kind of peace in the air, a feeling of freedom......a fresh new life is just beginning for me....one of independence, and thats what I want x

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Saturday 10 July 2010

light at the end of the tunnel.....

.... this picture seems to sum it all up to me right now.
There is light at the end of the tunnel. All the crap I'm going through right now will
all be a distant memory in a few months time. And at the end of the tunnel
I believe that there will be something better for me, something more worthwhile, something worth waiting for. I dont know what and I don't know when, but I have to believe things will be better.
I've now told hubby its over. I've urged him to look for another place, and he has

an appointment booked to look at a house on Tuesday at 5.30. I've opened up a
new bank account in just my name to have all my direct debits transferred and
to close our joint account. I'm already feeling better by starting these little steps
to happiness and I'm feeling more positive already. Furthermore, I have been brilliant this week with the weight ! I'm back in the 12's, and thats closer to where I want to be....

Whatever the coming months will bring, I'm ready for it. The ups the downs, and eventually a new life that I am fully in control of....

Thank you for your support guys over the last couple of weeks, you help more
than you know x

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Monday 5 July 2010

A heartfelt thank you x

I just want to say a huge thank you to the lovely people that replied to my last blog. Your kind words bought tears to my eyes. You really are a great bunch of people, and your wise words have helped me along in the next step of my journey....
After a couple more incidents this weekend, with my 37 year old child (husband) , I know now that its most definately over. By the end of summer I hope for everything to be sorted. Houses and possessions are only material goods, my heart deserves more happiness than this.
Thank you all so much for your lovely words. Your all wonderful x x

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